Dumb-duh-dumb dump.

I've got to go to the dump. I really don't want to. I don't know what my other options are for this crap, though. 
Here's how it started; 5 years ago, We bought a house.  And, as is the case when many people buy an older house, it really needed to be painted.  Being the ambitious, don't-tell-me-I-can't-do-it kind of woman that I am, I decided to paint the house myself. All by myself. Sam was busy this summer being an executive chef at a new restaurant and I knew I couldn't count on any help. It didn't matter, I could do it and I would get help occasionally when I really needed it.
Ha.
The project started with scraping and sanding the siding, which is this pressed fiber board stuff called Smooth Fiber Cement Lap Siding. I only discovered what this shit is called after weeks of research, but more about that later.  So, I'm doing the parts of the house I can reach on a short ladder and making good progress with the prep work when it all starts going to hell.  
BEES! BEES! BEES!
My house is made of bees. All different kinds.  Carpenter, wasps, yellow jackets, you name it, if it stings and eats wood, we have them.  Sam has to rip out and replace a soffit that carpenter bees have destroyed and the joining fascia board which has warped away from the rafter tail. There is a family of starlings living inside.
 

This Sam does all alone while I'm at work.  It involved removing the gutter, the nest and about 50,000 bees. It was truly a testament to our love.
Next came spongy rotten window sills and disintegrating 1/4 round trim. I learned a whole new skill set this summer and overcame my fear of powered cutting devices.  Overgrown landscaping planted too close to the house got hacked down to discover mouldering siding that I could poke holes in with my power washer from several feet away. A whole section of the house needed new siding. Damn, what was I thinking when I started this project? I don't even want to talk about heavy duty extension ladders. My inability to move the damn thing by myself would send me into fits of rage. 
Did I mention what a beautiful summer we had? No rain, hot as hell everyday? No excuse not to be out there getting shit done?  

After scraping and sanding

Seven months later and our home is now made of Great Stuff (greatstuff.dow.com) and caulk. Our awesomely wonderful friends came over and we painted in temperatures that were a wee bit chilly for the task but, damn we did a good job. I couldn't have finished it without them. I must also thank my incredible neighbor, who is a contractor, who gave me several stepladders to use for most of the summer, amazingly helpful advice whenever I asked, and who told me what my siding was called and found out where I could order a small quantity and have it delivered directly to my house (the answer was Builder's Best in Cortland, by the way. $20 to deliver 10 pcs. of siding all the way to Trumansburg. Score!). He prevented me from having a complete breakdown.

I hate that ladder SO MUCH!

So back to the whole point of this post. I now have several piles of debris that need to get out of my yard and besides taking them to the dump, I really don't know what I can do with it.  It's a miss-mosh of old telephone wires, siding, painted wood, aluminum end-cap thingies and what-all. And a kiddie pool. And a pink flamingo. 
 
I actually believe the pool and flamingo can go in the recycling. But the other crap? Dump time. It's terrible. It's the American Way. Don't forget to vote today.